i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
