Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Randomize
