Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
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