Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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