This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
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