I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Randomize
