"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Randomize