What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
