I don't usually arrange sex via text message
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Randomize
