Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Randomize
