you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
