I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
