What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
that's an acceptable place to lick
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
