I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
