I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
