I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
