I wannas sexs uuuuu
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
Randomize
