Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
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