these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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