how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize
