I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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