she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
