i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
