I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Randomize
