there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
My breasts were aching with rage.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
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