i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
