I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
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