Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
Randomize
