I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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