today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize