ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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