I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
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