Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
