literally had 100 drinks last night.
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize