And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize