last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize
