I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
