And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize