i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
