She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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