love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
Randomize