I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
