girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
