So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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