just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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