Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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