actually, I'm a sock model
Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Randomize
