I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
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