Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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