He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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