we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
