one might say we're banned from that church
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
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