My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Randomize
